Not All People Suck...Just The Jamaicans I Know

So Apparently I was slightly out of line in my last entry when I lambasted all people because of a few bastards that I have been forced to deal with on a regular basis this summer. Let me make a letter to the editor and note that the number of cool people and fun things I have done this summer far outweigh the opposite.

My Job at the Village @ Palmetto Dunes has been a great experience with overall great guests, great staff and great location. I hope to come back and visit them soon, maybe even get a job here come the fall. Which wouldnt be that bad for a temporary gig to build up some money.

My newest revelation: travel the world as a bartender or activities director (read: glorified babysitter) and have fun with jobs that require little to no major responsibility for a few years. This way I can brush up on my spanish (I work on everyday now thanks to the guys at the resort), meet lots of people, worry little about money and possesions, give to those in need, and take lots of pictures!!!!

As you may have guessed today has been a good day. Temps were less than 90 our A/C is workin in our apt again, and we werent super busy at the pool. Dont get me wrong I love activity but I cant stand them sometimes.

Sad to say this summer I have become more of an alcoholic than I should be. While I still have not reached "Tim" levels, I realize come fall and graduation imma have to slow my roll. No offense to any of you who enjoy drinkin'. I do too, but I am gettin grown and bein retarded drunk aint funny if your doin it every week.

I miss you peeps, havent seen you in awhile and cant wait for some long overdue reunions. Back in Iowa the first weekend in Aug. Back in DC not till Thanksgiving so us peeps gonna have to party like its 1999. (plus I will be 22...Ne One up for AC, NJ again? or for the first time?)

Peace out peeps!!!!

I FUCKIN HATE PEOPLE

Just in case there is some misunderstanding, I FUCKIN HATE PEOPLE. Now those of you who know me know I dont hate all people, only certain people or certain types. Like stupid people, or spoiled people, or annoying people (I know ironic isnt it). What I have come to discover is that I also hate inconsiderate people.

Now you shouldve know I was going somewhere with this and not just rambling. I try to always have a prupose on here. Mostly to vent, but sometimes to put the truth out there, no matter how much of an asshole that makes me.

So on with the story... O thats right I was talkin about inconsiderate people. Where should I start. How about with the most fuckin inconsiderate person I have met of late. KIRK!!!! If you read my blog u know who Kirk is and I am not wastin any more time fuckin tellin u about him, but I will elaborate.

This ass fuck leaves dirty ass dishes on the counter after he uses them so that other people can clean that shit up. He uses my fuckin mouthwash cause its in the bathroom. ( you dont fuckin share mouthwash unless u married or fuckin, and we aint either). And to top it off he leaves the apt when no one is there and leaves the door wide open "no one was gonna come in" how the fuck u know Ms. Cleeo. You aint got shit worth stealin. You wear the same damn two pair of underwear, if they steal that shit they got issues.

For the grace of God I havent flipped out on the asswipe yet. He is not helpin to paint a pretty picture for Jamaicans, well him and ghetto rude Jaimcan friends.

I think I feel better now, so I will stop venting have a good 4th yall...hopefully I wont have to vent before then...P.S. I think I have discovered a way to ignore the little bastards at work, more on that later!

At least parents known their kids are bastards...

Well I do have some good news to report...this week I have made over $30 in tips. Thats right, I did not stutter. These parents tipped me for my services this week. They finally realize the hell I go through dealin with their little badass children and have compensated me accordingly. So now I can afford to put my clothes in the cleaner and buy alcohol...YAY!!!

Same problems as always with my goddamn cheap as trifilin roomate. Just so you know the one I have the biggest problem with is Kirk. I think if he were in Jamaica they would call him a 'bloodclot'. I can not stress how much this dude pisses me off. The details of how I detest him are not worth the cyberspace they would consume.

O, Yeah Those Damn Spoiled Kids!

And HOW could I forget the "Holy Rollers"?!?!?!

So in my state of venting about my frustrating roommates I forgot to mention why I have rediscovered my hatred for spoiled kids and the group I grew to detest in the past whom I like to call "Holy Rollers". The latter group I will explain in more detail later.

Now, I will be fair and say that all kids are spoiled to some degree, including myself, but we all know the little bastards of whom I speak. The minute they enter the vacinity you can feel the bratiness eminating from them. These are the little munchkins that cry on cue, beat their parents and go so far as to make decisions despite the fact the parents could easily beat they little asses.

So here is the story of how I rediscovered my hatred for them while working this week. As we all know there are certain places that are magnets for spoiled brats (ice cream or candy stores, toy stores, and unfourtunatley for me pool decks, but in general it usually has to do with money.)

Well on Monday when I arrive for work there is no sign of the little bastards which makes me to believe it will be a good week of work. Ah, was I fooled; as I should have know, just as the freaks come out at night, the brats come out at noon. These little bastards came out of the wood work like I had never seen.

First this family of four children arrives @ the pool mother in tow, aside from their loud obnoxious behaviour which is sometimes forgivable in children my first indication that they were going to be trouble was when the mother, tryin to get control of them, threatened to "tell na-na". WTF!!!! Now an of you who half know me know what I was thinkin: "lady they ur damn badass kids and you gotta threaten them with ur mama, aint that some bullshit!"

Now needless to say and I dont mean to offend any of my friends but we all know these werent no "lil nigglets" (as I sometimes like to call them). (HAHAHA; sorry Crystal) Our mother would've beat our ass, especially since we was doin that shit in public.

All week long "Na-Na" was the controlling force to this little brood from hell. You would think if the woman and her husband, who was smart and left early in the week "to go back to work" (in my opinion he was prolly tryin to get some real peace away from these devil spawn that he couldnt get on vacation), couldnt control the first couple of little bastards they wouldve at least used the pull-out method!

Thankfully I met Na-Na and now I know why the threat works well. Na-Na got some sense in her head. I saw her pop one of the kids when they was actin out and not even flinch when they started to cry. There is a God and He is GOOD!

And while on the subject of God, lets move on to the Holy Rollers! While I will admit that I have recently come to find God and am very greatful for this introduction, this group still pisses me off to no end. Even those of you with faith will agree with me on this one. These mother fudgers are gettin married at 23, havin kids and bringin the bible and their guitar to the pool. Now dont jump on my case yet, but honestly who brings a bible to the pool to read like its the newest Stephen King novel.

Now they arent the worst case; the worst ones are the ones that go spreading the message while you are mindin ur business. Like the random dude who came up to me in a rest stop on the OH turnpike on my way home and asked me if I knew where I was goin when I died, While I was orderin BK no less. Once again WTF?!?!?! I was so tempted to say "Yes, I am going to dance with the devil on his glorious firey throne before we wage war on God and the Angels!" (with firey passion in my eyes and conviction in my voice of course) despite my new belief to the contrary, just so he would leave me the fuck alone, but God did prevail and I just said "yes" and moved on.

Uhh so much has been said that even I need a reprieve from my own thoughts...thats it for now.

Peace

A great internship and the spoiled kids and annoying rommates it comes with

I Got Me A Good Internship

So I started workin full time at my resort this week, which means i work 10-5pm Mon and 9-5pm Tues-Fri. Its a great internship so far, but..... There are four of us in the apt, 2 per room. 2 are from Jamaica, 1 from the Phillipines and then me from "one flew over the coockoo's nest".

There are so many stories to tell but writin it on the internet does no justice. My roomate eats like a fuckin horse but dont want to buy shit always eatin other peoples shit.."o we share food in this house". 2 of them are border line alcoholics as long as they aint buyin the alcohol. the last one is more dramatic than a spanish soap opera. The 2 jamaicans are always fuckin sleepin on the damn couch like they dont know what the fuck a bed is. and the 2 alcoholics dont wanna clean the fuck up after themeselves in the kitchen like they fuckin want roaches runnin around in this bitch....enough venting for now...if u wanna talk and hear more detail give me a ring

The Story of the Phantom Uterus and The Watermelon Seed

I was sitting aroun tonight talkin to my friend Jake and have finally worked up the courage to tell my most secret of stories....as you can tell by the journal entry it invloves a phantom uterus and a watermelon seed...read on its great work, Pulitzer Prize worthy if u ask me!

The Story of the Phantom Uterus and The Watermelon Seed© By Dominique Lipscomb

See I was born with an inexplicable uterus in my stomach cavity...none of the doctors could understand since I had all the male genitalia and just this "Phantom Uterus". My parents decided it wasnt worth the cost to have it removed when I was young since all the experts said "it poses no threat to his health and he will develop like a normal boy.(Thats only cause they didn't know I was gonna be dropped on my head and eat paint chips as a child).

Well all went fine until I turned 11 and started having internal bruising for no reason at all. I would wake up about once a month with bruises in my abdominal cavity. So my parents took me to the doctor and they found out that for some odd reason my floating uterus was menstruating. It was at this point the doctors said it was prolly best if I got it removed to prevent this from continuing, but my parents being too cheap decided I could "live with the bruising, it would make me stronger after all."

I went another two years before anymore new problems just the internal bruising once a month, which i had become a pro at masking with make up at this point or saying i got it from the previous nights Fight Club. Then one day I started gaining weight for no reason and i was havin all these weird moods and cravings so they took me to the doctor and and found out that a watermelon seed had implanted itself in my uterus and was growing. I was gonna be a proud parent! Well proud till I found out that I would have to pass it through my urethra cause insurance wouldnt pay for a c-section of a watermelon! That was when I said "fuck this...get this damn uterus outta me."

And thats how I had an abortion and a hysterectomy all in one. Come to think of it, it was one damn good watermelon....I guess that makes me a cannibal!

Hope You all enjoyed the story..have a great night. Please leave comments, it took alot of courage for me to tell this story, I would love to know what you thought about my ordeal and if you have any similar stories out there.

Being Bored on the Weekend Isnt Always Bad

It's the weekend and I am sittin in my room pretty bored; when the weather is nice but the pollen is high, being bored indoors isnt so bad. Why cant trees just be like normal objects and have physical sex so we didnt have to be covered in its "love juice"? As a homage to this my weird sexual dance, my entry is in these weird colors; green for spring and yellow for tree sperm. Remember that next time someone ask "have u ever been covered in sperm?" you can't say no unless you live in bubble!

I still got projects to work on and yes my computer is being retarded, but all in all this weekend is off to a fairly good start. If i am lucky I will get to play some tennis after watching it and be able to play some tournaments by the end of the summer. Still need to work on that second serve and net game, but baby steps.

Unfourtunately I do need to break some news to my parents that I kinda lied to them and that won't be any fun but I think I wil get through it without dying. The lie is complicated and not worth sharing, but I am working on that whole honor thy mother and father thing, though I would prefer to remain the prodigal son (you would understand what I meant if you knew my brother).

I dont like this whole living on credit thing. Being broke is no fun either though. Once again, I cant wait till I have disposable income.

Back and Blacker Than I Been In A While

Wassup peeps

Thats right I am back in town from my second spring break of the year, and though I do believe the first one was far more memorable than the second, they were both great. I learned some interesting thing during my "spring break" in Tempe, Arizona at the racquetball intercollegiate nationals.

1. I am good enough at racquetball to win a medal, but sucky enough to get my ass kicked by scary lookin women.
2. No matter how much I try to educate my white compatriots about black people they are still goin to make sweeping generalizations that will feel sorry for them.
3. I can become angry when agitated while intoxicated and attempt to stab people with a corckscrew.
4. Arizona is a great place to live from October through April
5. I could date a woman much older than myself and bone her too!!!!

I know I am stupid, crazy and weird, but tell me something I dont know.... Like what is the price of two dozen ostrich eggs in Zimbabwe? I am writing this in my MKT340 class because my prof droans on about nothin forever. No time to do it otherwise, I got a crapload of work to make up do to my second vacation. Signin off for now...
Holla Back

Back form Break w/ A New Lease on Life

I am back from Spring Break and it was the best time EVER!!!!! Thanks to my Grandma I and several other friends had the fourtune of spending ~$150 on a Spring Break that will be remembered.

In This section I would like to credit a few things with attempts to take my life in the order that they occured:
1st: I would like to credit mother nature with a valiant effort to get me killed by touching tornados down in the area on the first night, including less than 5 miles away.
2nd: I would like to credit the porcelain dish that broke in the black out darkness and proceeded to slice my finger open and proceed to bleed all over the place in my somewhat intoxicated stupor.
3rd: Last but far from least, I would like to credit a Mr. Leandro F. for trying to get me and my fellow car mates lost and therefore killed on our road trip to Fayettville, Arkansas. (I was in arkansas, and like George Bush they dont like black people)

But alas I am ok and Pumped to be headin to Phoenix next week for another week of celebratin and Racquetball of course. Sun & Fun!!!! I cant Wait.

SPRING BREAK BITCHES!!!!!!!

12:10pm
That's right fools, it my Mutha Fudgin Spring Break....gettin ready to head out the door so I thought I should drop you fools a line for the last time for an entire week. Yeah We goin to Branson, MO. Yeah there are a bunch of old people there. Yeah we gonna bust them wide open and mak'em wish they was young again. Be Jealous and wait anxiously for the pictorial assault that will take place when I alas return.....

PEACE OUT!!!!

I Have Been Made Whole

There are those of you out there who will wonder what has come upon me in these last few days. I have not been my usual always perky self. Well I aint puttin all my business out here in space but I do have good news to bring.

Recent events have caused me to reevaluate things in my life and I have decided to accept Christ as my saviour. Now dont go gettin all worried about me. Yes this means somethins in my life must change, but for the most part I will still be me. The Domo most of you have grown to know and love. Alas I have a new perspective and after truly reading the bible, I can understand why Christians are happy people. Does this excessive happiness flaunted in my face still annoy me? Yes! But do I hate them for it? No.

I am learning to pray and be thankful for things, and I am still not that great about prayer groups or worshiping together, just trying to build that personal relationship right now. So for now keep me in your prayers if you pray and I will work you into mine.

Have a great Day.....SPRING BREAK IS NEAR!!!!!!

March 6, 2006 - 2:45pm

Yesterday was the begining of the Highs and lows I inevitably will experience for the next couple weeks. Good news compounded by bad news. Somethings I will share and others I will keep to myself, but it does help putting things out here in cyberspace.

The week begins with anticipation fo the fun that is to be had at Spring Break with a group of great friends. There will be lots of craziness and pictures, so wait for the proof. Intercollegiates is coming up and I am pumped about going there and enjoying the warm weather and sun but it is not without costs.

I had intramurals yesterday and a tourney on Fri and Sat. I played ok,but not good enough to win. It is so frustrating to enjoy a sport butnot be good enough to win anything.

Preparing for the two trips is very frustrating. Yes I am grateful that I have the chance to go on the two trips, but I have lots of work that needs to be done before hand and not nearly enough time to do the things that I would like to do also. I should put my car in the shop and get one of my brake lights fixed. But I am teetering on the edge of brokness.

On top of that I stumbled upon some news yesterday that has me saddened and further frustrated with people and my own stupid decisions in life. No I am not dying and as always there is a silver-lining but this is proof that the heavenly being is testing me. Unfourtunately I may no longer be able to live the life that I was hoping to. And as always just hope the ramifications are to far spreading. Being the center of attention is only good when people love you.

Now I will go sleep and pass some wishes on to those up above. I need the rest and hopefully it will ease my state of mind. Maybe someday I will tell all, but till then hope this has given you a tiny insight to what is going on with me.

A New Commitment

I am newly commited to updating this page on a much more regular basis, yes it is time consuming and probably pointless since there isnt much most of you dont know about my goings on anyways, but apparently some people need things to occupy their day and facebook isnt enough.

The best news of recent is that I am going to Branson, MO for Spring Break with 6 other people. It is going to be a fun time in So. MO as we act a fool and relax in the process.

The "God Hates Me" news of recent is that I was in the right state for the wining ticket but I was in the wrong city by a damn hour or less. Why couldnt the wining $365 Million Ticket been mine?!?!?! Cause "God Hates Me"

What some of you might find to be severely amusing is I accidentally food poisioned myself this weekend and spent Sunday night throwing up in my trash can after bingeing on a variety of junk food. I thought a had a stomach of steal and here I am barfing from junk food.

I cant wait for the warm temps and lots of sun to come back so that I can get back out on the tennis courts I have grown to love so much, not to mention that the French Open is in May followed by Wimbeldon in June, I hope the internship I got in HHI, SC doesnt interfere with my viewing capablities

And yes I am going to put these stupid smilies after every paragraph just so that you can have a visual of what I was feeling as I typed it, in case u were clueless as to the mood of Me.

Its been over a month since my last entry and unfourtunately My Girls Venus and Serena didnt win the open, but nonetheless there were some good stories to come out of it. James Blake, the New Age Brotha For the Tennis Cause put some people on their heels and Andre had a dream. Now that means tennis is off till the end of the year championships. I think I will survive till then.

It is the midway point in the semester and I am burdonned with tons of work that needs to be done, so as not to fail my classes. I hate this time of year cause not only are we getting a shit load of work but the weather shifts drastically from pleasant, to not so. Now I have grown tired of babbling on so I will go. Look forward to more notes in the future.

The First One

So this is my first time doin this thing but I think it will be an extremely good way to vent some of my frustrations and put some of my ideas out there. Its not really meant to be read by others, but I am an open book and have no problem lettin other people in.

My main gripe at the moment is with the devistation that has taken place down south. The lives of many will be lost, and the sad thing is the ignorance that exists of this problem. The very school newspaper ran a front page article thursday about the city council trying to eliminate beer specials in city bars. At least 50,000 people are trapped in a city dying from circumstances beyond their control and these dumbfucks are complaing that they wont get to drink all night for 3 bucks. At times I wish i could live in ignorant bliss, but then I realize how stupid it would be to live like that.

And to top it off the dumbfucks down in NO are going around looting appliances when they have no electricty, what kind of dumb shit is that, they deserved to be shot for that, and to top it off raping women and young girls at there most vunerable. Reports have come out fo crowds beating people to death for such acts, may I say hurray for them. We are supposed to bond together in a time of desperation and devistation such as this one, but leave it to Americans to try and rip each other apart. This Shit didnt happen during the fucking Tsunami stricken areas....::tears::

On a more positive note though, US OPEN is on tv and that helps to take my mind off some of the tragedy. So many human interest stories come out of these events, poor people lifting themselves up to success. GO SERENA AND VENUS!!!!!!

Two Days Down!

11:11am - this morning I cleaned up the destruction that I caused the night before... I broke two dishes and threw up in the kitchen. Now I know as a newly devout person that this was very sinful but I did not intend to get as drunk as I did, but I did intend to drink.

Needless to say it was a great time and if the rest of this week is this good then it will have been the best spring break ever! I am in a public library at the moment writin this and i dont know if i will be back again this week, so be prepared to be filled in upon my return to Ames and the rest of civilization.

P.S. Jorge sucks BBM's ball in South Padre.